Journey to Change
Story and photos by:
Ricky Jimenez Carrasco
for
Sun City Biker Magazine
El Paso, Texas
To get things out of the way, my first questions to Linda Patterson were blunt: What got you here? Why do you personally have to make this trip? After a few concerned seconds, Linda understood what I was asking. And then, after a deep breath, “You have to understand that it’s been 13 years since the date of my last drink, since my last drug. At the worst point in my life, my 10 year old was suicidal. My 2 sons had been arrested. My 17 year old daughter was pregnant. My husband had barricaded himself in his room with an AK-47. I was lost. I just remember asking, ‘God help me.’ Then, I simply surrendered. I stopped trying to rebuild the house of cards that was my life.”
I had been scheduled to meet Linda earlier that day, but as luck would have it, we completely missed each other. When I was finally able to find her, she offered to meet at the hotel. I thought it would be better to have her interview outside, instead of cooped up. But how was I supposed to ask a person who had scheduled about 500 miles a day for the last two weeks to go for a ride? When I told her that I wanted to photograph her somewhere scenic, but clear across the city, she jumped at the opportunity to ride. I finally started the interview after taking some photographs of her and her bike “Dragon Slayer,” her beloved Screaming Eagle Fat Boy, at Tom Lea Park overlooking the city.
I asked her, from her low point, how did she get to be here, at the tail end of a cross country solo tour to raise money for the Big Brothers/Big Sisters of Milwaukee and to bring attention to abused and battered women? “Various persons were put into my life that taught me how to live. They taught me how to be a good person, a good mother, and a good employee. My boss at EZ Storage has been very influential to me. He has been very supportive of me, of my life, and even this trip! I am very thankful that… he now trusts me to run his company. I run 9 locations and manage 30 employees. And that’s without a college degree!”
“My life is…better, now.” At various times, Linda is exuberant, like someone who has just crossed the finish line in a race. Other times, she is reserved. I got the impression that she is proud of her accomplishment, but she doesn’t want to seem prideful, even though it’s completely merited. “My 10 year old? She is now a 24 year old graduate.” She beams a smile that could light up a room. “My boys are improving. My daughter now has a beautiful family of 3. They’re just wonderful.”
Linda now mentors abused women in California’s San Fernando Valley and is a motivational speaker telling her story across the country, hoping to inspire others to change their lives. Knowing that, I asked her what change she has seen in herself just in this ride. She gets ready to answer, then gets an amazed look on her face. “I knew I had to be tougher, stronger for this ride. I knew it was just going to be me, alone, on the road. If something went wrong along the way, I’d be a thousand miles from home.” She looked at me as if I had the answer, but she found it on her own. “But you know what? I think I just came to the realization that I had to be softer.” She looked around trying to understand her own answer. “I had to be softer because I had to allow myself to be vulnerable. I had to allow myself to be helped. I had to allow myself to ask others for that help. I knew that my online blog would be read and that it would help people. But a big part is about people helping me.”
Linda was amazed at the epiphany because she devotes so much of her time to helping other people. In helping others, she has found, she is still helping herself. “Throwing a pebble into the pond, it’s not about the pebble, it’s about the ripples. If you’re lucky, you get to see the ripples.” I asked her to explain one of those ripples. She looked over the city and almost looked teary eyed. She took a long moment to answer. “Michelle. Michelle is a lady I mentored not too long ago. She was married to a gangster. There was bad domestic abuse there.” She took another moment. I don’t know whether it was to remember Michelle’s abuse or maybe her own. Linda then got another big smile, “Now, Michelle works as a shoe designer for a large company. She spends her time flying all over the country. She probably travels more than I do!”
Bikers use their time in the saddle for meditation and for introspection. It was apparent that Linda had had practice because she would occasionally take moments to look over the city. There was a storm rolling in from the east. It was well over 50 miles away, but from Rim Road, we could see the lightning clearly. She called it a natural fireworks display. She continued unprompted and not really looking at me until the end, “When I started this, I think I just wanted to see what would happen. I had a guy write to me, Ernie, who is fighting cancer. He read my blog and told me that he had given up his fight. Then, he read my article and he went back to the doctors and told them ‘Let’s fight this.’” She looks at me almost baffled. “From my story!? It is exciting to see these ripples, to see these people, to see this sunset. To see all THIS!”
To me, the El Paso landscape can seem mundane. Linda, I’d like to believe, was not just referring to our desert corner of the world, but to the fact that she was able to progress to get to this point where she can travel as she wishes. She is no longer someone’s wife to hit, but an independent person who wants to live and learn. “’Journey to Change’ is not over. I don’t know that I would want to have another 7000 mile trip over the Interstates. I will do something. I have my family to take care of, my ladies that I mentor, and me.”
“Dragon Slayer” broke down while in El Paso. Her run to Rim Road was her last of the official Journey. Since her bike was not able to be fixed on time, the Barnetts lent her a bagged Fat Boy that she dubbed “Blue Bird” on which Linda finished her ride to San Fernando on August 2nd. Linda Patterson would like to thank all the people that helped her along the way, especially all the Harley Davidson dealerships that supported her.
If you would like to learn more about Linda, go to www.journeytochange.me
Reprinted by with permission of Sun City Biker, www.suncitybiker.com, and Ricky J. Carrasco
